I thought of you today as I was scrolling through Pinterest. My secret board is still there with nursery ideas. I could have deleted it but I have hope that I will soon be blessed with a son. As I write this, I'm reminded of where I was hoping to be today. In my perfect plan, I would be planning your first birthday. In my perfect plan, my family would be complete. However, God's plan is different and better than anything I could imagine. It's hard when I think about the day following your death. I didn't know until early the next morning that you were with Jesus. I will never forget that day & the heartache I experienced. I think about you every day and I will carry you for the rest of my life. Selah sings a song "I Will Carry You" and the lyrics fit perfectly!
"There were photographs I wanted to take
Things I wanted to show you
Sing sweet lullabies
Wipe your teary eyes
Who could love you like this?"
As I think about these lyrics, I am reminded of how much I love you and how much I wanted you. You gave me hope and a desire to grow our family. Losing you opened my eyes and heart to what God has been trying to tell me for a while! I will forever be thankful for you! I hope you have the best birthday with Jesus!
Here is the only picture I have of him!
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